My Blessed Life As A Full Time Working Mommy: Let the Tears Flow

My Blessed Life As A Full Time Working Mommy: Let the Tears Flow: "I like to think I have a big heart. That is not meant to be a cocky statement by all means, but it just shows how quickly and easily that p..."

Let the Tears Flow

I like to think I have a big heart.  That is not meant to be a cocky statement by all means, but it just shows how quickly and easily that precious face above just melts my big heart.  I had a very dificult time today.  Work was a little tough, very busy (which is good) but on top of my very busy day I had some things in the back of my mind the whole time.  When am I going to get my mountain of laundry done?  I knew I needed to go home on my break and do the dishes that I swear I just did.  But with all that I couldn't get the most powering thought out of my mind long enough to focus.  My sweet Carter love cried for me this morning.  I couldn't hold him, I couldn't love on him or hug him and tell him it would be ok.  I had to just keep walking and keep thinking how much this SUCKS!  The hubby and I have sacrificed a lot to be where we are and me working is just something I know I have and need to do.  (I want to clarify something real quick.  I don't want people to think, because I work that we don't sacrifice because we do.)  My heart broke into a billion pieces.  I would much rather have spit all over me, food in my hair, "stuck" in the house all day.  I can handle the mountain of laundry and forever pilling dishes but I can't handle his cries beacause mommy has to leave him for 9hrs.  I feel like he is going to forget me.  I know that isn't true but it does cross my mind.  I wonder if he will resent because I can't be there for him when he has his summers off from school?  Goodness, I know this is where the "living in the moment" takes place and I do but this is what takes place in my mind when I'm alone.  It's just a inner struggle that I know I will be able to conquer one day.  The Lord knows my heart... 
To make up for my lost time during the day, I try my hardest to make sure that our time we do have together is extra extra sweet!  I'm looking forward to this weekend.  I get a extra day with my hubby and baby boy and it's Carters first 4th of July...I just know it's going to be FAN-TAB-ULOUS!  We have lots of fun things to do...we LOVE our Murfreesboro! Happy 4th!    

Fun Day...

O Saturday couldn't have been any sweeter! I got lots of laughs, kisses, snuggles, and messes.  This was def. a blessed day that I got to spend with my hubby & baby boy.  It was a bitter sweet day.  We were suppose to head up to Kingsport to see my sweet momma but plans changed and we had to stay at home, but we ended up making it a VERY FUN DAY! First stop...the farmers market.  This couldn't have been more fun! Carter did so good.  He looked at everything and wanted to touch everything.  I for sure have a 10mos old!

Our Day At The Farmers Market

Our Beautiful Downtown and Some Very Yummy Peaches...Carter Loves Peaches

After we finished at the farmers market I remember thinking "I don't know if this day could get any better".  It was only 8am and we still had our whole day ahead of us.  I then, for a split second and only a second, I got a little bit sad, only because I wish I could have this time with him everyday.  I look at his sweet face as he smiles back at me and I can't help but get lost in his pure sweetness and all my sadness just goes away.  I try to "live in the moment" but I won't lie, sometimes it's a struggle.

So after our wonderful time at the farmers market we had a quick trip to Nashville to pick up Aunt Cassi from the air port and then we all headed  back downtown and had a fabulous breakfest at Murfreesboro most famous City Cafe...AMAZING!

   After a couple naps and some lunch our day wasn't quite over just yet...Park Time! Carter loves swinging!  He just laughed and laughed and he wanted to stay there forever...

Then we had a blast on the slide...

 He Made It To The Top!

We had a fun filled day for sure.  He was a tired little boy after our big day.  That is where all my suggles came in.  Now if only I could figure out how to be with my little punkin head everyday my life would be complete.  I pray daily that the Lord would help me figure out a way to make my dream job come true.  I want to make everyday with my little Carter Love a Fun Day!  

Time To Eat!

If it's one thing Carter loves to do most it's EAT! Boy has he been a eater since day uno.  Sometimes I can't feed him fast enough...

This sweet baby boy shows his monster side when it comes to food.  He doesn't play around haha!  One thing I wanted to have the most control over while he was little is knowing exactly what goes into his body.  As a mother I feel like it is SO important to teach our children healthy ways to eat.  Yes, I am going to be that mom, the health nut.  Poor Carter, I know! ha!  At 6 or 7 I want my kids to ask me what a happy meal is.  Now, I'm not saying if your kids eat happy meals that your wrong, I'm just choosing to not go that route.  Don't worry, I have heard over and over, "you just wait till they are screaming in the backseat..." well, my answer to that is, he can wait till we are home. lol!  I want him to love to cook and have fun in the kitchen.  I want cooking and kitchen to be happy words.  Some of my favorite memories from when I was little was cooking with my momma in the kitchen.  We all had our own night to help her cook and it was so much fun!  By the way Carter helps me cook now.  I strap him to my body and he just follows me around everywhere in the kitchen.  He seems to have a blast! 

With all that said, even though I'm a working momma and my time is def limited, I still find the time to make Carters' baby food.  My favorite website is weelicious.com and a great starting website is wholesomebabyfood.com.  By making Carters' baby food it gives me a great peace of mind about knowing exactly what goes into his precious little body and I can't forget to mention the amount of $$money$$ we are saving! O. MY. GOODNESS. do we save a ton of money!  Working moms let me be the first to say, it is very possible to make your own baby food and it not take anytime away from your sweet bundle of joy.  Yes, sometimes I do have to stay up a little later but that's okay.  I love the fact that at 8mos I was cooking his food with cinnamon, basil, rosemary, and all kinds of fun spices.  Here are some of Carters favorites...actually all food is his favorite...even avacado! Happy Cooking!

Green Beans

Cooked with a slice of apple, onion, and rosemary...It was so hard not eating these all myself!

  Banana Mango Sauce

3 Bananas, 3 Mangos & 2tsp of Lime Juice...If you use 3 of each it leaves a little extra for a smoothie for mom & dad :)

P.S. Please excuse the bad pictures...the good ones are taken by my mother-in-law and sister-in-law...they are the professionals :)

Celebrations!

OOO yesterday was Father's Day and it was a good one.  Me and the hubby celebrated by doing NOTHING! yep, nothing at all.  We did go to Matts parents later that evening but that was it.  It ws nice to relax with the hubby.  Carter treated his daddy by taking 2 naps, one was 2 hrs and the second one was 3 hrs! Thank you Carter! We are keeping it simple this year, so I made Matt one of his favorites (even though it was a new recipe for me to cook, thanks Paula Dean) BROWNIES! but they were special because I made this delicious choco sauce to go on top:
*One box of browine mix
*5TBS of butter (haha, sure it's fat free)
*1 cup of packed brown sugar
*1 1/2 cup of chopped pecans

*Fix the brownies according to the box
*Poor into a 9x13 inch pan
*in a seperate sauce pan melt butter, then add brown sugar and pecans.  Cook until brown sugar disolves. Then pour pecan mixture of brown mix and bake on 350 for about 25-30 min :) ENJOY!

Also to keep it simple, Carter made his Daddy a card for Father's Day.  He seemed to have fun with helping me make it.  Carter lost focus a couple times and wanted to eat the marker and pen so of course I had to help him...hehehe :)  Right now Carter gives the best high fives EVER! So that was the inspiration for the card...

What an amazing day to share with my blessed little family.  I am so blessed and thankful to not only have a amazing husband that treats me like a queen and goes above and beyond to help our family and work so hard but he also is the best dad! He changes diapers, and doesn't complain about it, he loves to feed, play, and gets up with me at night when Carter decides to play...what more could a working mommy ask for? I am truly blessed beyond what I deserve!

Not only did I have the best time celebrating Father's Day Sunday but Saturday was a busy day as well, but it did come with a lot of guilt.  Me and two amazing girlfriends got to travel to the big city of ATL to celebrate the future wedding of a dear friend! We got to see her in her wedding dress, we got sized for our bridemaids dresses, had lunch, and went back to her place and got to see and hear all things wedding! Then we ended the day with of course something sweet at a wonderful cupcake bakery.  It was a MUCH needed girls trip and it was SUCH A BLAST but I couldn't help and think of my two boys I had to leave behind.  Being a working momma not only do I feel awful for being away from my son but my hubby too.  Saturday is our family day and I had to give that up.  I was more than happy to go see my girls but I felt bad for doing it.  I didn't see Carter at all on Saturday but remember because I have to work I don't see him much Monday-Friday either.  I feel like I don't know how to balance the two (some much needed advice would be helpful).  Guilt def comes into play because I don't get to see Carter much during the week so I felt like I was giving up his time on Saturday to do something I wanted and needed to do.  I need to remember that having some so called "me" time is okay when needed because having that time will re-boost me and it's important that Carter has a joyful mommy and the hubs has a happy wife.  With being a working mommy I will say that I am more invested when I'm around the people I love, no matter if it's my family or friends because most of my time is spent at work and I don't want to take what little time I get with them for granted...

Life Saver...Or Should I Say Style Saver?

Working mom or not, when does ANY mom get a chance to get all styled up?!?  We don't and I am totally fine with it except I don't think my job would think it would be very professional if I came in with my running shorts and a good ol' Chi O t-shirt on (that's my attire when I'm home with Carter).  So with me being a working mom I have to get up and get ready if I like it or not.  I was talking with one of my best friends the other day (she has a baby girl 4mos younger than Carter) to make sure I wasn't the only one who chose sleep over clean hair.  Lets be honest working moms...how often do you lay there and think "I could just put my hair in a pony tail...I have only had one pony tail this week".  Then the next morning I think "I could have a teased pony tail today?" So of course I choose sleep, it would be silly if I didn't! ha!  I have a perfect solution and any mom out there is going to love that I have shared this amazing secret, that is if you don't already know about it by now...



   And behold, Tresemme Dry Shampoo=best thing EVER! This keeps me from having one less pony tail a week at work.  So with this A-H-MAZING product I still get to choose sleep and I can still "wash" my hair. :) Thank You Tresemme, Thank You!  And happy sleeping moms. :)

Time???

O my sweet Carter Love is so sweet! He's 9 1/2mos old and yes, changing his diaper is like WWIII, but he is still my sweet little man! As I was cuting his nails, after his bath that he LOVED, he laid his little head on my chest and we just sat there for a moment, that was the sweetest moment of my day.  I then said our prayers and I laid him in his crib...as I walk away I can't help but think, "where did all the time go?"  First, where did the time go, he is NINE MONTHS OLD!  Didn't I just give birth? Crazy, he is crawling everywhere & all 19 stairs on his own, feeding himself, holding himself up with one hand, my Carter Love is growing!  Then I can't help but think, "where did the time go today?"  I had a total of 3.5 hours with him today...yes, that is because I am a working momma (and let me clarify, not by choice). Not all working moms work because they want to but they have too.  Anyway, I am beyond thankful I had the 3.5 hours with him, it was very special time...he had my full and undivided attention.  I'm very thankful we are able to leave Carter with his yaya and aunt tay-tee but I can't help and think, I am his mommy, I need to be the one that teaches him and helps him grow and develop.  It makes me really really sad.  A sadness I really struggle with.  I wish my day had 32 hours in it...can I make that happen in anyway? Being a full time working mommy my time has to stay organized.  I havn't mastered that yet but I'm getting there. :)   My sissy gave me some amazing advice.  I have thought of it before but hearing it from some else I guess makes you think of it more often I guess lol.  "I need live in the moment of the time I get with him and stop thinking about the time I don't get with him"...seesh she is good, we are twin sissys for some reason!

Starting Something New...

Welcome to my new blog! This is my first time so if anyone would like to guide me in some blogging 101 feel free.  I just thought I would give a few insights on what it's like to be a full time working mommy.  It's all for fun and it's a nice way for me to let out some thoughts and show off my little man. :) I'm far from being a writter so I might make some mistakes or may not make sense but these are my thoughts so welcome! :) Once start to understand how to get this thing going, I will start filling you in.  Thanks for coming along with me!